Dear Saint Anthony, our blessed mother, Holy Spirit, Saint Jude, Saint Michael, Saint Francis and Saint Joseph a very special request on my part for you to help me understand this relationship with Jackson SHANI I want very much for it to be a physical, loving relationship. I am not sure that is what he wants, please give him the confidence to tell me to my face what this relationship is what he needs and the confidence for me to tell him what I need I’m on this whirlwind, merry-go-round that I cannot deal with anymore. I’m ready to eliminate him from my life and it hurts so much. I don’t know how to do it. I’m so sad and the medicine helped. I just can’t take it anymore because of the side effects. Thank you , I need your guidance your support your help. Please get me through these next two weeks. Part of me wants to be here and Martine wants to run home but I don’t want to be home either. I’m like a cheater a solitary figure. I love you all pray for me keep me , help my friend Nancy